Why Is The Divorce Rate SO High Among CHristians?
The US Census Reports and US National Divorce Statistics at present show that the religious group with the highest divorce rate are Christians in particular the evangelical and southern baptist sects. Their rate of divorce is even HIGHER than couples professiing no relgious affiliation or to be atheist. Even more surprising its the conservative RED state- Texas and not California, New York or even Nevada that is the LEADING divorce state in the USA.
Now the reason I ask this is because CHristians LOVE to proclaim their religious standards of family life the HIGHEST ones. How come the facts don’t support this? Secondly, is their problem that they’ve completely outlawed pre-marital sex for their followers resulting in their young people getting married TOO young in order to have sex? After all, waiting till you finish college, get a job, house and then getting married will mean being celibate till you are around 25-29. That’s a LONG time when your hormones are at its peak. Opinions?
13 Responses
bettierage
30 Jan 2010
davlynark
30 Jan 2010
The divorce rate is high everywhere, not just in Christians.
jwhesse2001
30 Jan 2010
Probably because the spouse doesn’t believe in God and so hence the divorce. But the Bible does say that divorse isn’t good so that is something to think about.
CollegeKid
30 Jan 2010
That is interesting. I think a lot of people of faith do not openly encourage each other. If their is no desire to grow together as Christians then their foundation as a Christian couple is flawed.
Sir Chyver
30 Jan 2010
Bad family values.
Just passing thr
30 Jan 2010
MANY laws against and about that. People who get divorced and/or remarry are not really Christans. Fakers and wanna-bes.
Funny. They might as well be homosexuals in Gods eyes, and yet they still look down on that and abuse them.
tankswife06
30 Jan 2010
i am not sure why divorce rate is so high, i do know that it seem as though people do not honor committment anymore people get divorce because they don’t like how their partner ties their shoes. we are not supposed to run at the first sight of trouble. God doesn’t like divorce. and the bible says you have grounds for divorce w/ adultery. it doesn’t speak about anything else.
Aubrey
30 Jan 2010
Well last I know the Protestants broke off from the Christians/Catholics because King Henry VIII couldn’t get divorced, so I’m assuming this is something still upheld with them- could be wrong though, but that’s how we got Protestants and they make up a lot of Americans.
And it’s not the Christians who’ve "outlawed" pre-martial sex, it’s something God has said. And it can and should be done. Basically you’re saying it’s okay to put your hormones before God’s word? Meh I’d have to disagree…
God Bless.
huntjames32
30 Jan 2010
the only reason a married christian couple is ever suppose to divorce is if one committed adultery. back a few centuries ago king Henry thee 8th broke from the catholic church because they wouldn’t grant him a divorce so he could marry his mistress. ever since then others have forgotten the biblical laws regarding marriage and do whatever they feel like doing. as far as divorce rates go. most Americans claim to be Christians so the divorce rate is going to be higher among them as to compared to any other group.
UNISH25
30 Jan 2010
Within Christianity, divorce has become almost commonplace, and the interpretation of the Holy Scripture on divorce widely varies among Christian denominations. However, the first 400 years of the Early Church, the church maintained a unanimous voice opposing divorce.
Bible commentary on divorce comes primarily from the gospels of Matthew, Mark and Paul. Although Jesus touched on the subject of divorce in three of the Gospels, Paul gives a rather extensive treatment of the subject in his First Epistle to the Corinthians chapter 7: "Let not the wife depart from her husband…let not the husband put away his wife" (1 Corinthians 7:10-11), but he also includes the Pauline privilege. He again alludes to his position on divorce in his Epistle to the Romans, albeit an allegory, when he states "For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth… So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress" (Romans 7:2-3).
Recent research, however, interprets the words of Jesus and Paul through the eyes of first century readers who knew about the ‘Any Cause’ divorce, which Jesus was asked about ("Is it lawful to divorce for ‘Any Cause’" (Matthew 19.3). This suggests that Christians in the generations following Jesus forgot about the ‘Any Cause’ divorce and misunderstood Jesus.
The ‘Any Cause’ divorce was invented by some Pharisees who divided up the phrase "a cause of indecency" (Deuteronomy 24.1) into two grounds for divorce: "indecency" (porneia which they interpreted as ‘Adultery’) and "a cause" (ie ‘Any Cause’). Jesus said the phrase could not be split up and that it meant "nothing except porneia". Although almost everyone was using this new type of divorce, Jesus told them that it was invalid, so remarriage was adulterous because they were still married.
The Old Testament allowed divorce for the breaking of marriage vows, including neglect and abuse, based on Exod.21.10f. Jesus was not asked about these Biblical grounds for divorce, though Paul alluded to them in 1 Corinthians 7 as the basis of marriage obligations.
This new research emphasizes that Jesus and Paul never repealed these Biblical grounds based on marriage vows. They were exemplified by Christ (according to Ephesians 5.28f) and they became the basis of Christian marriage vows (love, honour, and keep).
Hopefully Helpfu
30 Jan 2010
People assume way too much. They assume that because the other person is a "good Christian" they will also be a good spouse. This is not always the case. Many Christians rush into marriage because they are afraid that all the "good Christian guys/girls" will be gone if they don’t snatch this one up quick.
Another reason is that many people, women in particular, are excited about getting married and the wedding and lose sight of who they are marrying (no offense to the ladies). It may sound crazy, I’ve seen it happen.
Getting married before one is ready also occurs because people want to "make whoopie." Since Christians believe in abstinence until marriage (or at least they should), many couples get married earlier than they should because of this.
Many couples only know each other in the context of "warm fuzzy/rosey" situations (i.e. church, social groups, etc.) and don’t see the person without the mask of social expectations that comes with it. I am definitely NOT advicating living together before getting married, but I am advicating a good, liscensed, Christian pre-marital counselor. While many pastors are great individuals, that doesn’t mean they are good at pre-marital counseling. It may cost more, but cut corners on the reception if you have to, not what could help the longevity and fruitfulness of your marriage.
Some of these reasons may sound far-fetched, but I have unfortunately witnessed them all.
Adder_Astros
30 Jan 2010
People get divorced because they did not truly understand what they were getting into when they got married. They meet this person somehow, and they get married, thinking that the whole thing will be just like the wonderful picture they always had in their mind. Seriously. If you look into the average young girl’s ear, you can practically see the image of what they believe their marriage should be (a prince and a princess riding Unicorns in a church made of white cake and clouds being married by the only real Priest on Earth while a veritable who’s who of Irish Nobility look on and applaud for the rest of Eternity with pixies and faeries and love and fun and stuff). The problem is that true modern marriage is actually more like a prison break, where the bus turns over and you escape chained to some stinking ape that you don’t like.
Sadly, the modern Christian World thrives on people that don’t really know what’s going on. People that would sooner be governed by that picture in their head than the facts that sit right in front of them. Therefore, the average christian is even more likely than the average person to allow themselves to be swept into a situation like marriage blindly…. on faith…. than the average Joe or Jane that just thinks they should get married.
I don’t know. What. Hey, you asked.
jessicabjoseph
30 Jan 2010
Very interesting question. I have wondered about this myself because I KNOW about the high divorce rate among Christians, especially evangelicals. I have seen MANY MANY couples break up in my former church.
You do make a GOOD point about people marrying TOO early. I personally think you should not get married unless you personally KNOW yourself, can support a family and have known this person intimately for a while. This takes time and it is VERY hard to be celibate for so long -till you finish college, get a job, some life experience and maturity. I would say the average age of marriage in my old church was around 19/20.
That is TOO young for MANY people. In a few years, they may realise too late they are NOT compatible and NOT the people they thought they were.
Let me ALSO state that there is NOTHING in the bible that strictly FORBIDS pre-marital sexual intimacy. In fact one of the greatest erotic stories in the bible in the Song of Songs occurs between two UNMARRIED young people. If you read it it is obvious there was PHYSICAL INTIMACY going on there. There was nothing shameful about it, nor were they punished for it. I think sexual incompatibilty can be a BIG problem in marriage, especially if the two people have NO sexual awareness of themselves until they have already made vows that are troublesome to break.
While it may not be the ONLY contributing factor, it may be a big reason why the divorce rate is so high.
In addition, like another respondant says, just because someone is a zealous Christian does not mean they are a GOOD person or even a GOOD spouse. A LOT of personailty flaws, emotional dysfucntion etc can be covered up with a religious mask.
It may be that there are just fewer Atheists, BUT, I will say that expectations may have a lot to do with it, there seems to be a Christian expectation that your spouse will never do anything like look at members of the opposite sex, porn seems to be a big bone of contention, and maybe a set, rigid expectation of what marriage should be, instead of finding your roles in the relationship naturally.